I'm sure a proper telling off could go as long as 20 minutes with a probable preamble of the student standing in front of the head teacher's desk in silence for a good five minutes while the head teacher collects his/her thoughts, but that would be the end of it.
Yes, true. And in these days of 'safeguarding' there might be half a day suspension or Mum might be phoned.
As an outsider viewing this kind of thing in the US from the media (like the wrong end of a telescope) it seems as if there is a huge legal machine that just crushes away irrespective of the need and actual severity of the case. Am I wrong?
You're not wrong. "Zero tolerance" swept the land and there is precious little the average person can do to change how schools work. Running for school board requires a commitment that most people cannot accept (need to feed the family).
This whole thing is pretty much why I support parents picking the school the kids go to with the money following that choice. It is really the only way that parents will be heard.