Hacker Newsnew | past | comments | ask | show | jobs | submitlogin

Also gifted child here, but grew up with parents who drilled into me that "effort matters, you might not be the best, but with effort you can be better than who you were yesterday and that is a worthy endeavor" It's just a slight switch of mindset, but that small switch carried me through times when subjects got too hard and when I wanted to give up because I felt I wasn't talented enough.

I knew so many gifted kids who got perfect scores in college freshman year (engineering) but started giving up when things didn't come as easily to them. They all ended up leading mediocre lives after.

I wasn't as smart as them but I knew I could always do better if I tried harder (even though the ROI wasn't great at first). So I just kept grinding (16 hour days studying). My GPA rose very gradually until eventually I finished with a not-great but respectable 3.6 (the 3.4-3.7 range is typically attained by folks who maybe didn't have natural talent but worked hard). That GPA got me into grad school where I got to study what I loved (way fewer exams, more research).

Carol Dweck wrote a book on "growth mindset" that talks about this. You don't have to read the book, but the idea of growth mindset, though simple, has been really transformative in my life.



> Also gifted child here, but grew up with parents who drilled into me that "effort matters, you might not be the best, but with effort you can be better than who you were yesterday and that is a worthy endeavor"

Can confirm that getting lauded for effort encouraged doing hard things and pushing the limits of my abilities, rather than focusing on things that came easily.


Being lauded for effort when you didn't put in any effort doesn't help though, just makes you think grownups are dumb.


Being lauded for effort you did put in can be quite effective, as confirmed both by numerous studies and by the personal experiences of myriad people.


Sometimes the greatest gift you can give a gifted kid is failing early at something they want, so they learn the grit to achieve it.


Absolutely. No matter how gifted a person is, there is going to be some point in their lives or some domain where pure talent will be insufficient.

Even super geniuses like Terence Tao struggled (he nearly did not pass his generals).

https://terrytao.wordpress.com/2019/06/27/living-proof-stori...

https://web.math.princeton.edu/generals/tao_terence

The American Mathematical Society has a PDF of essays of brilliant mathematicians (including Terence Tao) who despite their abilities, faced obstacles and difficulties that their sheer talents were inadequate to overcome, and they had to persevere.

https://blogs.ams.org/inclusionexclusion/2019/06/26/living-p...


> Absolutely. No matter how gifted a person is, there is going to be some point in their lives or some domain where pure talent will be insufficient.

Unfortunately, for some this comes in university where we see peers with worse grades getting access to better graduate roles and work placements because of who they are related to, and you can't study your way to having the right surname.


>parents who drilled into me that "effort matters, you might not be the best, but with effort you can be better than who you were yesterday and that is a worthy endeavor"

This is also taught heavily in middle/high school sports; it's a great life lesson.


if you had to grind 16 hours a day studying to get a 3.6 GPA in undergrad you werent "gifted"




Guidelines | FAQ | Lists | API | Security | Legal | Apply to YC | Contact

Search: