I realize for an outsider it may feel like a support group or a bunch of complainers ranting, but I'd like to add here: Me Too!

I left facebook late in 2011, for various reasons, but mostly because it was making me sad and depressed. I was an extremely heavy user before that. I can say for sure that leaving facebook has made me objectively happier and less sadder.

I remember that XKCD comic about social network effects. Our minds are 'trained' to 'compare' ourselves with 10-15 of our friends, and assert that we lie around the 'average'. When we look at facebook, where everyone puts on their best (and in the hundreds) our brains 'think' we're doing a lot worse than the average, and we feel bad about ourselves. I've heard a lot of people talk about not comparing to people on facebook, but... you really can't help it.

Full Disclosure: I opened a different facebook account. JUST for family, because my mom didn't _believe_ that I didn't have a facebook. I open it maybe once in a couple of weeks, and have gone for many months without logging in.

Here's something I'd tell to other people: if you feel depressed after using facebook, delete it. Forget about 'not keeping in touch', 'being a loner', etcetera. Your mental health is way, way, wayyy more important than knowing what your freaking high school acquaintance's third child had for lunch on a random day. Have a small group of close friends, and call them, hang out with them. Your larger group of friends will always be yours. If you need social networking, get snapchat (I'm a critic turned fanboy). It's fleeting, so you don't feel as bad about yourself, and people are not as annoying.

Addendum: Here's how people make non-FB friends. A friend of a friend wanted help with grad schools, so I agreed to talk to her. We chatted on Skype (second encounter, EVER), and we ended up talking for an hour. She wanted someone to talk to and asked if we could talk again soon, and I didn't mind one more friend so we're skyping again soon. You make friends out of nowhere; don't need facebook for that. Facebook gives you the illusion you're 'in-touch' with everyone, when all you're doing is gathering 'intelligence' on their lives.

> I remember that XKCD comic about social network effects. Our minds are 'trained' to 'compare' ourselves with 10-15 of our friends, and assert that we lie around the 'average'. When we look at facebook, where everyone puts on their best (and in the hundreds) our brains 'think' we're doing a lot worse than the average, and we feel bad about ourselves. I've heard a lot of people talk about not comparing to people on facebook, but... you really can't help it.

I'm quite fortunate to have been quite successful in life, especially recently, so it's not this aspect that creates problems for me. It's the constant sharing of political / religious opinions and ensuing bickering (especially among my family) that gets me down. I've actually seen a few family relationships completely break down as a result of arguments over petty things on Facebook, with real life consequences. I'd rather not be exposed to any of that anymore and that was my reason for massively reducing my involvement in it.

Haha, oh yes, that too. I'm not doing too bad myself ( the 'gradstudent' lifestyle isn't THAAT bad), but I see what you mean. These things take up emotional energy to be dealt with, and most people consider the cost when using Facebook (that's what I got from the article).

It's the fear of missing out. All the social media services build their foundation on that addiction. Once you delete the accounts then the feeling slowly goes away and you get back to what life was like before all this nonsense started.

> It's the fear of missing out. All the social media services build their foundation on that addiction. Once you delete the accounts then the feeling slowly goes away and you get back to what life was like before all this nonsense started.

And Facebook explicitly tries to prevent you from getting rid of that addiction. They have a "feature" that kicks in after a few days of non-use to incessantly remind you via email that you're missing out. So-and-so posted a picture, etc.

As far as I can tell, there's no way to disable them without also disabling emails for event invites and direct messages, which is just shitty. I've had to setup gmail filters to get rid of them.

I fear not missing out. If I need to hear about it, I will. I mainly use Facebook as a thing to waste time with while I'm waiting for it to be time to do something else.

A caveat - if you have the skills and enough people in your life to actually facilitate a healthy lifestyle.

Yea totally. I suppose a lot of people are actually using Facebook for work and their businesses (and Tinder) and so can't really get rid of their account.

Also, I feel quite smug when someone asks to add me and I can say I don't use it... Maybe that is douchy...

Haha, the smugness seems pretty common around here. Each to their own I say. Still, I do secretly envy the ones like yourself who have managed to escape!

FYI you can use the Messenger app without having a Facebook account (at least before attaching Messenger to a Facebook account, not sure what would happen if you’ve already done so).